Going backwards

-21 pips today – I’m going backwards. I’m not trading anymore today or tomorrow and will be trying to get my head in order – it’s clearly not there.

I can’t go back to demo trading, I will feel far worse than I do already. I have reduced my pip value to 10p though so there’s not much further down I can go.

I am way too eager to get into a trade at the moment. I must be, I am, in revenge trading mode. It’s not like I’m going to claw back my losses at 25p per pip or 10p per pip now, but that is what I am doing.

Hence, no more trading for the rest of this week. I will collect my thoughts, try my best to put all this behind me and will be back on Monday. I may even go over the old course material and see if I can get any help from there to get my mindset sorted.

The rules are so simple and yet I’m not following them. Follow these simple rules and I will be financially free a year from now, even with the current level of capital that I have left, and yet I’m not following them. What the fuck is wrong with me?????

Am I just giving myself too hard a time? I deserve it, that’s for sure. I don’t know how to explain what I am going through anymore......I’m at a loss!